Posted by admin on April 3rd, 2009 in Communication, Humor, Middle School Boys, Teen Age Girls

My fellow writer/contributor from Canada and Global Voices started “Around the World in 80 Clicks” recently – it reminded me of my travel lust and besides, I like the concept.   The idea is to get people (moms) from around the world to click to each other all the while writing about their likes and dislikes about parenthood.  I would wager I will be one of the few with teens.  I am so lucky.  It gives me an excuse to send you  to my friend across the pond to - AModernMother from Britain.   And, of course I can do a little “venting”.   Don’t worry, this won’t get ugly.

The Five Things.

1. Laundry. Size 10 shoes and large “Slayer”  t-shirts never came to mind when I gazed into the cherubic, sweet face of my (then) 5 year old son.  The motto of the teenager: wear all the clothes you own before dragging them into the laundry room.  Be sure to leave  dirty clothes hanging from every available lamp, door knob, chair, or  floor  until the stench could melt a penny.  Our teens do their own laundry, so of course, they jam the washer so full that the clothes come out domino-fashion and are destined to be permanently wrinkled until the next wash.  Don’t get me started about the wet swimsuits from water polo or swim practice.  When you have two swimmers/water polo players, something is always wet in a place it’s not supposed to be.
2. Electronics Can you hear me now? Can you hear me NOW?  This is no joke in my house. With permanently installed headphones, a mother must climb the stairs repeatedly to even be heard by the household teens.  Watching television with your favorite teen? Not without a laptop in place and the constant tap, tap tapping to keep you company…it’s a bonding moment with you, your daughter and…20 of her friends.
3. Social Calendars I love that my kids have friends and I’m proud they choose to have a rich-varied social life.  But, sometimes they don’t ask before they commit.  Back in the days of …let’s see, twelve and under, all the social arrangements were made either parent to parent or a tagged conversation; child-to-parent and back again.  Not so anymore.  And, this makes for some mis-communications and uneasy moments.  I’ve ended up at a theatre in a car that holds 6 people and there are 8 boys ready to hop in.  Ooops. One of the boys got an email from another boy, just thought he’d go but failed to respond to my son that he was going.  Oh, and not to mention the anxiety about whether a parent is even in town when your teen says they want to spend the night at someone’s house.
4. Communication If this list was only about teenage boys, I’d put this first. Communication is a loosely used term when describing what passes for talking in my house.  Words like “Fine” and “Sure” or “OK” seem to (in my son’s mind) mean any number of things like...maybe, a sentence?  Every teen’s fear is to hear repeated back to them what they’ve told you in a previously “weak” moment of communication.  I know that.  They hold themselves close for a reason.  But…sigh, I do like to talk.
5. Appreciation There is none.  Well, to be fair, I know they do appreciate me and what they are given.  The problem is, they were so joyfully appreciative when they were little!  I remember the sheer joy when one of them received a gift they had been waiting for and the hugs…gosh I remember the hugs I used to get.  I’m lucky to get close to my son at all.  He will tolerate a hug  (if it’s not in public or if it’s a “necessary” departure to somewhere or…) but he will not hug me back.

So…my fellow moms of young kids, read and heed.  Even though young childhood is difficult and exhausting, some things just go away (hopefully to return at a later date) with the teen years.  Don’t worry though, there’s plenty to look forward to, I’m  still thinking about what they are!

Disclaimer:  this is a satirical look at teens. The teens mentioned above represent a “composite” picture of teens …my kids would never act like this.